What a blessed Christmas!

What a beautiful way to start Christmas!  Waiting on the steps in anticipation of what is under the Christmas Tree!  Of course the two older ones had to be dragged out of bed - but the 5 youngest were up at 5am!

This Christmas was very special, it was Griffan's first.  He shared with us he had never gotten a Christmas gift before.  We talked about how great it was that he got Christmas gifts and a family this year!  He agreed it was the best!  What he doesn't know is it is our best Christmas too.  Jeff got very emotional several times, thinking about what a special day it was for Griffan and that we were blessed with the opportunity to give him this gift of a family. 

I pray some Christmas in the future, Griffan fully understands just how special this year was.  I hope he discovers it isn't about the presents he had under the tree, but the true gift of this Christmas was........Jesus. 

Ukrainian American Hoosier!

We have a very happy and loving little boy!  We have had nothing but smiles and hugs since we got home (I know the honeymoon will end!).  It is so wonderful to be a part of making a child so happy.  For Griffan, there was no hesitation, no looking back - only forward.  What a wonderful Christmas gift to us and to him!

I pray that for every child that is waiting, God is touching the heart of a family - I also pray that the family will be brave enough to weather the difficulties of the adoption journey.  We are fighting for the very lives of these children - it isn't an easy task.  But for those who are courageous enough - it is a journey that can be filled with hidden blessings.

My prayers go up for all those families who are struggling in their process and need strength and courage that only God can provide.  I pray for the children that so desperately want a family and those that don't because they don't understand what a family is.

For today, I will concentrate on all the smiles, hugs, and "I love you Mama"'s that Griffan can give and tonight I will watch A HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS and be thankful that our son is home.

After 50 hours of travel....we made it home!!!!!!!

Will post more details later - needless to say I am still tired. After travelling for 50 hours, we got home last night around 9pm. The snowstorm on the east coast caused us major travel delays.

While I got no sleep - Griffan grabbed some when he could (or would). When he found out we were almost to Indianapolis - he perked up and got silly! He was so excited. He told me on the plane he doesn't want to be called "Vadym" any more - he is now Griffan forever.

To kick off his first day in America - he had to go to the dentist and got a tooth pulled. He had a badly decayed molar that was in to the nerve and causing much pain. Poor baby...Hopefully tomorrow will be pain free!  Either way - he seems to be the happiest boy on earth right now!

Introducing Griffan

Prayers for Yulia...

Had fun today handing out the socks, gloves and hats I bought for a few of the kids.  We then had a little party with cookies, fruit and juice.  I love spending time with the children - Griffan stayed busy most of the time taking pictures which kept his pouting to a minimum (only once).  We were wrapping things up to take Griffan and Luba with us to our apartment when one girl began to cry...at first she wouldn't tell us why, but she finally told us she was crying because she too wanted a mama and papa.  My heart was breaking for her.

I truly wish at this moment I could win the lottery and bring her, her 3 sisters and brother home with me too but the odds aren't very good.  Please say a prayer for Yulia, her large sibling group makes it very difficult to find a family that is willing, but it doesn't prevent her from wanting parents to love her and care for her.  God is more than able to provide, and all 5 of the kids are amazing....beautiful, sweet, smart, polite, kind, .....

I am praying that this year, Yulia gets her Christmas wish.......a mama and papa who love her and cherish her for the beautiful girl that she is, as well as her beautiful sisters and brother.  It is the season for miracles.

Life is good.......

Today when I got up, I had the opportunity to watch the sunshine (that has been absent since our first day in Ukraine) cut through the clouds and beam in my window.  I sat there drinking my coffee and praying - a great morning!

Later, we got to the orphanage and asked if we could take the kids for the afternooon (12-6pm) and were given permission~!  It was fun sitting with the kids, trying to play a game that teaches them English, and feeding them!  I made Griffan take off his pants and mended them in 3 places (2 of them in an unmentionable spot!) and Lena mended his jacket. 

After getting home, we discovered we had HOT water!  Enough for all 3 of us to have a shower and wash our hair (no more furry legs!).  I posted on Facebook that Christmas must have come early!  I am so thankful that God has allowed me to be on this journey - and I pray that many others will follow me here - there are so many precious kids here.

Every day the kids greet us and are anxious for recognition and a hug.  Their smiles are so beautiful!  When we are visiting our kids in the assistant director's office, many children open up the door for a quick look and hello.  Griffan's friend asked if I could help him come to America someday too - he wanted a family.....I wish I could touch enough hearts to empty all the orphanages around the world....but it is not within my grasp, only God's.  I am just happy to be a small part of His plan.

So for now, powerless to solve the orphan crisis, I will concentrate on the happiness of one little boy, and sharing as many smiles, hugs, and hello's as I can during the rest of the time I am here and count my blessings.  Life is good, God is amazing!

On the bright side...

Today we got up early and headed to Cherkassy!  Less than $2 for a 1 1/2 hour ride!  Looked around for souveniers but couldn't find any.  It is so funny - people lined up all over the street selling outdated Avon products.  It was a nice break in our schedule (even though our kids didn't like we weren't coming today). 

Went for pizza - was so looking forward to it after a bad food day yesterday.  We went to our main restaurant in town and it was closed for a funeral dinner so we went down the street to another place we had tried to go before but it was always closed.  Music was BLARING and there was no one in there.  The waitress came and gave us a menu and got us some hot tea (Lena thought she used the same bag for all 3 - very weak!).  We started to order and they had nothing we asked for - so we finally asked what they did have!  Between the 3 of us we ordered  borscht, fries, pelmeni and meat.  The borscht was lukewarm (oil had seperated from broth), the potatoes tasted moldy, the pelmeni was sticky - meat was so so -but afraid to finish it.  We decided to just go home and have chocolate.

Back to the pizza -  not exactly mozzarella cheese and it wasn't much to my liking.  Julie and Lena liked it okay, but I was disappointed after the bad food day yesterday (we only eat one meal a day) - On the bright side though before we left Cherkassy we stopped at McDonald's and had a hamburger, fries and cherry pie!  Tasted wonderful!!! 

Bought a few things at the store today and stopped at the internet cafe as ours wasn't working last night or this morning.  Got on the cold bus to go back to our apartment.  The funny thing is - the situation was so "ukrainian"!  The bus station sells bus tickets, but the driver also sells them on the side, the inspector comes to count how many people and how many tickets were paid for and there were 4 more people than had bought tickets.  The bus driver negotiates it down to paying her for 2 (they both pocket the money!).  As we are pulling out past the station - another 5 people got on the bus!  Lena told us that bus drivers are wealthy!  So funny!

We are hoping to be able to pick up the kids tomorrow and spend some time with just them.  I bought some games to play with them and have some movies.  We will see......

No hot water again tonight - I joked about not being able to shave my legs but on the bright side it is at least keeping me warm! 

The end is in sight!

One week from today I will be heading to Kyiv with Griffan and finishing up the US Embassy paperwork!  I will be home on Saturday, the 19th!  We have a really long connection in Frankfort and a short one in Philadelphia.  Please pray we make our connecting flight!  I have this dream of being stuck and not making it home due to holiday traffic!!!!

Julie had court yesterday and all went well.  The judge is giving her the paperwork a day early which should allow Julie to make it home for Christmas!  Praise God!  Luba has also been very shy and quiet and after court she was like a different child!  I think the poor thing has been worried about getting her hopes up too much...and felt the relief.  Her personality change had Julie worried and when Luba opened up it went a long way to reassure Julie!

I miss my family so much - I can't wait to see them!  I love the emails the girls send!  I am so glad we have internet here!  Reading their emails goes a long way in helping me get through this time! 

Griffan is also so excited about going home......vsegda (forever!).  He is so cute when he practices saying his name: Grrrrrrriffan Na-tan-ee-yell Tarrrrrrrrr (they roll their r's here and can't say the th sound!).  :)  He is such a loving little boy - likes to hold my hand, get hugged and kissed - no wiping them off yet and saying, "Mom!" like most boys his age!  He can be a pouter but quickly gets over things.  I sense a lot of frustration coming when he gets home - he doesn't like to do things he doesn't do well!  AND like most boys - doesn't like school!

We continue to endure under less than ideal circumstances - limited availability of water and lately no hot water!  But we will survive and be more grateful for where we live!  Looking very forward to that LONG HOT shower! :)

Still here...

Not really sure what to title the post today...other than we are still here.  Jeff headed out Friday night to Kyiv and flew home Saturday, so Julie and I are left to finish things up.  We had a new arrival to our routine - Anya (who is going to travel with the children coming in December) arrived late Friday night and it was nice to have someone new to talk to and have new conversations! 

Julie had to go to the notary on Saturday and since we were going to get to the orphanage late, we got some kalbasa, cheese, ham, bread, drinks and fruit to take to the orphanage and had somewhat of a picnic with the kids.  When we first got there, we had all the kids coming to Indiana later this month in and all the ones that had been this past summer in a small room - probably not more than a 10x10 room.  Picture 3 adults and about 12 kids in a very small room - with a table and alot of chairs.  Can you spell claustrophobia??? 

At first it got off to a bit of a rocky start - Vadym (who now wants me to call him Griffan :) was NOT happy about having all the kids in the room, there are a couple of kids that want to be in the room that he doesn't like.  He began to pout and not make a very good impression on Anya!  Not a proud mom at that point - so I took him outside the room and had Anya tell him he needed to behave.  I assured him I was HIS mom forever and that out of all the kids in that room I loved HIM!  I told him he would soon be leaving the orphanage forever and that the children in the room were still going to be there and that I wanted to get to know them and maybe help them also find a forever family.  He listened and apologized and I gave him a hug and kisses (which I love that he lets me and seems to love it!).  He came in and was a good boy the rest of the time - even told Anya he was sorry he got off on the wrong foot.  I guess now that he has a mom and dad he wants to hold on tight.

We had a type of interview session with the kids - what do they like to do, their favorite colors, favorite foods, and asked if they had any questions about coming to America.  It was alot of fun as the kids shared!  I don't think any of them will be frightened coming - they are all anxious about it and looking forward to the adventure!  All the kids wanted to know about their families - and that was hard..........I have one little 11yo girl who is so sweet and so beautiful (she has 2 sisters and 1 brother) that was asking about what "her" host family was like....I don't have one for her yet (and she is one of my favorites!) and I felt so bad...If you know anyone who would even consider the thought of 4 kids (ages 11,10,9,7) please let me know!  They are wonderful kids - all of them. 

Today is like the others - getting up early enough to try to catch the water on and waiting to go to the orphanage.  Coming back and trying to figure out what to do until bedtime.  At least we can enjoy Anya while she is here - she leaves tomorrow and Lena arrives.  So again - new conversation and a break in the monotony.  Also - Julie's daughter Alyona's older sister is here to visit a few days (which makes Julie feel better too).

Julie will have her 2nd court on Tuesday - please pray it will go well for her.  I had told her I would stay with her if she wanted me to and she doesn't.  I will not leave her alone though - we will make sure someone is with her the last few days.  I leave on the 19th (which is a Saturday) and on Monday Julie will hit the road running with Victor to get all her paperwork for the visa.  We are praying that Julie will make it home on Christmas eve.......please pray with us that she will get her Christmas miracle too.

I wish I could make the process smooth for everyone.....I wish there would be no Ukrainian or Italian couples to compete with, no officials who are trying to make a point, no judge that has the desire to wield their power, an adoption authority that was consistent, a country that would understand the why behind what we are doing, no delays, no stress, no pain........but unfortunately I can't...all I can do is to try to encourage and guide families along the way and trust that God ultimately knows best.  There are days that my job is such a burden ... but then I spend time with the children...so beautiful, so wonderful, so in need of love, so worth all the struggle, stress, and pain that a family goes through and the burden of the job.

Helping these precious children is so worth the cost.........I wish I could help everyone understand that.  Please pray that God would continue opening that door to help these children, that God would stir hearts of families to open their lives up to them, God's provision for each family, that each family would trust God to lead them to the child He knows is best for them and the strength for all of us to get through the rough patches in the process.  All for God's glory.....

Good news and a bump in the road....

Okay - the good news is that we did have court today and things went well.  In 10 days, V will officially be Griffan!  He was very happy and so were we.

Now - the bump in the road.....Julie who travelled with us had her court scheduled today too but unfortunately the judge she had only wanted to do the preliminary court today and scheduled the official court on Tuesday.  Not what we expected or hoped for...needless to say Julie was upset.  This will be pushing it to get back by Christmas.  However - they don't call it Christmas "Miracles" for nothing.

Please keep Julie in your prayers and that she is able to get all the paperwork she needs to make it home by Christmas.  I know it is only a few extra days but when you are here a day seems like 10.

Can't wait to enjoy all the comforts of home....water than runs all day (instead of 6pm to 8am), toilets you can flush anytime you want and that are actual toilets and not holes in the ground, pizza delivery, tv we can watch and understand, signs and menus we can read, knowing that when you are in line that you are actually in a line and no one is going to keep cutting in front of you, being able to brush your teeth and wash your hands like normal, washing a full load of laundy(not miniature) and actually tossing in the dryer, .............as you can see home sounds pretty good right now!  I miss the girls and dogs coming to snuggle in the bed with me! 

But all in all - it is worth the cost......I would do it again for a little boy whose face lights up and runs to greet us!  After all.......Christ did so much more for us...a little discomfort on my end is nothing compared to what He did to give us a future.  

Would LOVE to hear from you - it is great to get emails or comments!

Going to Court Friday!!!

Good news!  All that was needed to accomplish court has been achieved (thanks to our wonderful team!)!  We will have court on Friday!  Jeff  will leave Friday to head back to Kyiv and home on Saturday! 

God has been wonderful to us and has so far answered every prayer and every hurdle has been jumped!  We are praying that we will make it home by 12/19! 

I would write more but I am tired today and can't find the words to make it very interesting!

I am so excited that it looks like we may get our Christmas miracle after all!

A little relief to the monotony!

Today we are just waiting and trying to find something to fill our time until we head to the orphanage!  We will get to visit with the children for about 3 hours and then we will head to the one and only restaurant in town (which is very good!) and have our main meal of the day (we actually have been able to have toast here in the morning).  Then we walk home and try to find something to occupy us until we can go to bed. 

However  tomorrow will be special as we are heading to a neighboring town to visit an orphanage director I know!  There is actually a McDonalds there and we are very much looking forward to it!!!!!!  Then for even more excitement - we are having a party for the orphanage on Thursday and having court on Friday!  Jeff will be heading home Saturday - while Julie and I wait for our 10 days and do the medical/vsa thing!  We are hoping and praying for everything to work ou for us to be home on 12/19!!!!!!!!

All is going well here and our team is AWESOME!!!  I couldn't ask for any better! 

Hope to update you on Friday with our official news! :)  Please keep praying!

The green-eyed monster....

We had a great day at the orphanage today!  Even had the opportunity to skype home so that V could see the kids and they got to see him.  It was too loud to talk as we had extra kids to spend time with us!

For most of our visit, V was doing fine - but then towards the end he became a little jealous of all the time that mom and dad were spending playing with the other kids.  When I it was time to go, two girls grabbed my hands and V got upset.  I had Victor tell him that we were his parents and we loved him the most, but these children had no one.  He still didn't like it much...

It is amazing how very much these children soak up any attention!  They are like a dried up flower needing water and when you talk to them, show an interest and affection - you can see such a difference in them, the light inside turns on and they bloom.   I hope I never get callous to their need.

We won't get to see the kids tomorrow, we have some paperwork to get done.  I am all for whatever it takes to get things rolling as well as a break in the routine!  We have about 4 1/2 hours a day occupied and the rest is down time.  For those coming - bring anything you can think of to do! 

Tomorrow is a critical day for us - we will know then how things stand and IF we get to have court on Friday.  We are praying very hard - hoping for good news and that it all comes together!  I am hoping my next post is a joyous one!

Same day, different date...

We are at the phase of the journey that each day is the same as the previous and the one to come....I love seeing the children but the routine gets monotinous.  Julie and I only have another probable 17 days of it...

Today we did get to meet some other children, a couple of them that are coming to Indiana in late December.  Yulia is adorable, an older girl with 3 siblings - she is quiet but seems to be really sweet!  Denys Y also seems to be a really sweetie!  I have seen a couple of the others but not enough to make any impression.  I think we should have time tomorrow.  For now we sit in a room and play with the kids.  We have a backpack that has some games and I brought some old video games with me - as you would guess those are the biggest hit with the boys or girls! 

We also got to see some art the children made - very interesting and some quite beautiful!  We also got to see V's room and his bed.  He is so sweet!!!  He is just so happy to have a family...he sits by us and sometimes he will just smile and lay his head on us.  He is very snuggly with me and sometimes with Jeff but he really likes to tickle and be a boy with his daddy.  He has made it clear he is very ready to go home and has not a moment's hesitation about it.

We should know on Monday if things will continue to go well.  Please keep praying!  I enjoy being here with the kids buy miss the ones at home.  We have had fun emailing and skyping though!  They are so funny! 

We have become the regulars at the one restaurant in town - it is really good and for 4 of us to eat a big meal is only around $3-5 per person. The taxi we take back and forth from the orphanage to our apartment is pretty inexpensive also - it is around $5 round trip! 

I guess for now that is all...I look forward to hearing from you!  We have about 4 hours a day that are occupied and about 12 a day that are not!  The down time is a killer!  Julie and I think we may do some travelling during our 10 day wait - we aren't sure we can handle that much down time for that long of a period!

Hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving meal!

Things are going well!!!

Things are going as well as we had hoped!  Yesterday we were a bit nervous as the judge is older and has only done 2 adoptions, he was also very busy and was unable to schedule us before mid December.  But the good news is he said that we could use another judge to get our court date set!  So as of this morning, we are looking at having court on December 4!!!  If things go as planned we will be home before Christmas - which is my prayer!  Thank you God!!!!!!

Yesterday, our facilitator had the opportunity to talk to "V" about his new name.  I had written down the meaning and the "WHY" we wanted to give him a new name and "V" gladly said yes!  He is so anxious to get home, he is very excited!  The teacher told us that he carries his photo album and letters from us everywhere and shows everyone.  She knew about the lipstick kisses, and musical cards!  One of "V"'s friends recognized us when we arrived to the orphanage and ran to get him - just by seeing our photos!

Everyone tells us what a good boy he is - which we know, but it is good hearing it!  It is so cute to see how happy he is.  I will try to post more later - we are heading to the orphanage to visit now.  Keep praying!!! 

I am thankful....

I just realized that today is Thursday - which means it is Thanksgiving!  Although there will be no turkey and fixings for us today I do have alot to be thankful for...

I am thankful for a God who loves me beyond my imagination...so much so that He sent His son to die for me.

I am thankful for a saviour that was willing to give His life so that I may live.

I am thankful to have had a family that gave me a Christian foundation.

I am thankful for a husband that loves God and loves me and our family.

I am thankful for all of my beautiful children - both by birth and by adoption. 

I am thankful for my soon-to-be son, that we have the blessing of being his family.

I am thankful for my friends, both old and new.

I am thankful for my job - I love what I do and can't imagine doing anything else at this point.  I love working with the children....and being able to see their lives changed.

I am thankful for my home, especially in seeing the conditions so many others live in.

I am thankful for my country - praying that it stays that way!

Being away from my family is hard, but it is a worthy sacrifice.  I pray that "V" will someday understand the sacrifice and will have a lot to be thankful for.  I pray that he and all the other children I have helped to come home all understand the importance of the opportunity they now have.  God has given them all a new start in life, them out of the millions of orphans around the world....I pray that each of them will discover their God-given purpose.  My hope is that they will all have the same desire to help orhans and those in need BECAUSE of where they came from.

Have a wonderful and blessed thanksgiving!!!

I

Finally!!!

Today we finally made it to our destination!  Headed to the children's inspector first and picked up the inspector and found our way to the orphanage, after a little while they brought the kids in!  They had asked us if we needed to go to the bathroom first, but I said no because I didn't want to miss seeing "V"'s face as soon as possible!  Jeff chose to go and mised being the first one to see him. 
"V" had a shy smile on his face and I got a bit of an awkward shy hug first, then after he sat down beside me he looked at me and said, "Mama" and I replied, "Vsegda" which means forever in Russian.  He smiled and I hugged him tight.  He was very excited to turn and see Jeff - he went and gave him a hug too, a little more comfortable now.  He sat so sweetly beside me for a while and then he had to write a letter to say that he wanted to be adopted by us, which he did with no hesitation!

I was happy that he remembered everyone's names - he only stumbled a bit over Payton's but only once.  We had to make a quick exit because we had to go to the notary to get our paperwork started.  We went to the only notary in our city and he was very busy - said he couldn't see us until next week.  Well that doesn't fit in to our plan of hoping to have court next week so we ended up having to go to a notary about 30km away.  

Funny thing is that she noticed I had notarized Julie's paperwork and she warmed up to me and began asking about what was required to be a notary in the US - I replied $30 and an application.  Here it is quite different and she enjoyed telling me.  I must have made a good impression because she gave me a really nicely bound book about notaries in Ukraine with her picture bookmarked. 

We then headed back on a near empty tank (had visions of having to walk back!).  Since we had to get up around 3am this morning and head out we decided to go back to our apartment and get to bed early.  Tomorrow we will get a bit more paperwork done and head to the orphanage.  It will be the big day to discuss names!  Praying he likes his new name.

I hope to write more tomorrow.  I am so exhausted I don't have much to share today......

Today, and impressions....

Today we will be going to pick up the necessary paperwork to go to the region where the orphanage is and start the process to get a court date.  It has been difficult being so close to "V" and not seeing him, I am so anxious to see his beautiful face and to hear him call me, "Mama" again. 

When he visited this summer he called me "Mama" a million times a day, but when we got to the airport on the day he left he stopped calling me "Mama" and called me, Lydia.....it broke my heart that he had to seperate his feelings and to draw back.  I want him to know how much we love him and that he will soon have a "Mama" forever....and a huge family!

Yesterday we brought some souveniers, and you know you have been to the slope too often when the guys recognize you!  LOL!  Oh well, he gave me a good price (or so he told me).  We will go back today as Jeff has a list of items to buy. 

Unlike most adopters who do blogs, I have not written much about my impressions of the country.  After being here so often I just don't think of it as often. :)  It is so funny here though........you will go in a nice restaurant and find the hole in the ground toilets - how nice of a restaurant does it have to be to have a real one?  I have also decided that the people here also walk different than Americans do - they have a purpose to it and a fast stride, where Americans have more of a lazy walk or a saunter. 

You will also not find any respectable female in Ukraine NOT wearing her boots!  Short ones, spiked ones, knee high, thigh high, boots of all shapes, and colors!  Also - natural haircolor here is not appreciated by the wormen - almost every woman I see has her hair colored - old and young alike.  They always look so stylish and I always feel so dowdy here!

So - for now that is a snippet of what it is like in Ukraine.  Not much news to report yet, tomorrow we will hit the ground running, trying to complete the process in the least amount of time possible.  We should be able to be home by Christmas - or that is our goal! 

Please keep us all in your prayers!
Blessings,
Lydia

SDA TODAY!

We finally made it to the SDA today and had our appointment!  The photo they showed us of "V" was so sad - it was taken when he first came to the orphanage.  Basically though our appointment was short and there were no surprises.  We did a little shopping on the hill, went to the embassy for Jeff and had lunch.  Not too exciting.  We will not leave for the orphanage until Wednesday but we are hoping to hear something  by Friday about when the possibility we can have court. 

Not much to really write today...I am looking forward to posting when we have exciting news.  I can't wait to see "V"'s sweet face!  It is so cute - the girls email and ask now about "Griffan".  Praying he likes his new name! :)

Love to all!
Lydia

We made it!

We made it safely to Kyiv after spending a beautiful day in Munich!  The weather was amazing and we didn't even need our coats!  We had the traditional German food - bratworst and German beer.  Not too bad!  It is such a beautiful city.  After a long day we finally made it to Kyiv at 10:30pm - we were exhausted and slept until noon the next day. 

Spent a non-eventful day yesterday - Susan and her little boy Cayden joined us and we went to eat and that was about it.  Today we will go to buy souveniers and hang out.  Tomorrow is our appointment with the SDA and we are hoping for good news that we will get our referral and get to head on to the orphanage. 

Nothing exciting or newsworthy as of yet.  People are still wearing the masks here due to H1N1 but only a few. 

Will hopefully post good news on Monday! 

"Adopting one child won't change the world; but for that child, the world will change."

I love this quote...I have been thinking about it on and off today.  I also happened to be flipping through channels and saw a clip of Bruce Wilkinson (one of my favorite authors) talking about his new book: YOU WERE BORN FOR THIS: Seven Keys to a Life of Predictable Miracles.  I mention both the quote and the book for a reason....families that are adopting are often told we are "amazing" for doing what we are doing.  It isn't that we are amazing or anything special but that we have come to understand that we can truly be the change we want to see in the world (another quote I love!). 

In the book (that I am going to go out tonight and buy to read on my trip) YOU WERE BORN FOR THIS, Bruce suggests that we are the vehicle that God uses to deliver miracles.  Isn't that a beautiful thought?  For example, our family is the miracle that our Ukrainian children needed....and God blessed us to be the deliverers of that miracle.  We could have said no - and we could have missed out on the blessings that God has brought in to our lives, through the children that we are privileged to care for, the friends we have met, and the job that I feel that I was purposed to do!

I pray that each and every person that takes the time to read this will be encouraged to seek God and take part of being God's plan for someone's miracle.

You can listen to Bruce Wilkinson talk about his book here: You Were Born For This...part 1.

Excitement, relief, ton of things to do...

We finally have our new appointment date with the SDA!  I am thankful to finally know - the relief is a welcome feeling!!!!!!!  I had been praying that it would be on 11/23 and God answered that prayer!  We are excited to finally make the preparations to go and get our son!

With a Christmas miracle in mind - we could make it back by Christmas Eve!  If we do - Praise God!!! and if we don't - Praise God!!!  I am learning that He is in total control and that every day is His to do with what He sees fit.  It is not an easy lesson to learn and I still struggle - but it is getting a bit easier.  Feel free to remind me of this when I am whining because I miss my family after beeing overseas for 4 weeks! 

Now the flurry of activity begins!  Due to the holiday travel - we have to leave on Thursday of next week instead of Friday as we thought.  So we now have 6 days to get everything done!  We are in pretty good shape since we had started - but now I have to organize that sea of suitcases and do some last minute errand running! 

We decided to go ahead and get the H1N1 vaccine - our doctor suggested it due to us being overseas and the outbreak there, he felt it put us in a higher risk than if we stayed here.  One more thing to get done...but better safe than sorry.  I bought dayquil, nyquil, immunization boosting vitamins, and miscellaneous cold/flu meds to take over.  I also have a friend who is donating a box of masks to take over - we will give what we have left to the orphanage to use. 

All the families I am working with also got their travel dates - let's just put it this way - there will be alot of hoosiers in Ukraine over the holidays!  Everyone is so excited to begin their journey - the anticipation has been building and finally they can spring in to action!  It is funny how quickly the excitement wanes in light of so many things being out of their control....I just pray that God will give them (and me!) the strength we need to hold on and to walk the path He has already ordered.  It is one thing being able to "talk the talk" but a whole other situation in being able to "walk the walk".  Your faith is stretched beyond what you could ever imagine - but somehow you get through it and come out so much stronger on the other side. 

My prayer for each and every family is that God will be glorified in every way, every day.  That they will be an encouragement for each other, and hold each other up when needed, just like in the battle in Exodus: 
Joshua did what Moses ordered in order to fight Amalek. And Moses, Aaron, and Hur went to the top of the hill. It turned out that whenever Moses raised his hands, Israel was winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, Amalek was winning. But Moses' hands got tired. So they got a stone and set it under him. He sat on it and Aaron and Hur held up his hands, one on each side. So his hands remained steady until the sun went down. Joshua defeated Amalek and its army in battle.  Exodus 17:12 

I will try to update as I can while I am gone!  I am excited to see all that God has planned and to share that with you!  Please pray for our health, our families health, our new son's health, and all of our safety.  I pray that this Thanksgiving - we will truly understand the meaning of thankfulness and from where our blessings come....God bless.

Sad today....

I am facing today with some sadness - not because of our travel delays but because of regret.  If you have not read Katie's latest blog entry - I encourage you to do so - it is the November 8th entry.  (in fact - read it first and then read mine!)

This 21 year old girl has touched my life so profoundly.......and is making me face the regret in my life but also encourages me to have the determination to change.  Katie quotes Francis Chan from one of my favorite books (CRAZY LOVE), "How we live our days, is how we live our lives."  She points out that many of us have wasted days in waiting on something instead of living in the moment.  I am sad to say that I have wasted too many moments in my life - waiting...just like the past few days. 

While I have not gotten very upset over our delay - I have not taken advantage of it either.  Today I will take the time to enjoy the time I have with my daughters - before I have to make our new son a priority.  More snuggles, more secrets, more individual time with each of them before "V" comes home and needs our focus and attention.

This reminds me of another favorite book of mine by John Piper "A LIFE NOT WASTED".  I don't want to look back at my life and see alot of regret - I want to try to live my life in such a way that I can find a way each day to glorify God.  If I can learn to do that and teach my children to do the same I will be happy - or if we at least strive to live our lives that way I will be pretty happy. 

My favorite quote from the book is, "Only one life, twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last."  Can you imagine living our lives in which every decision we make is weighing whether it will be done in Christ's name and have lasting value?  How different would our lives be?  I know mine would be vastly different.

So - the point of my whole entry today is to encourage you to live each moment........or at least to do the best you can.  I hope that Katie's post encourages you to live.......

Disappointment....stupid pigs...........

Thanks to the H1N1 virus (aka - swine flu) our scheduled departure date for Ukraine is postponed indefinetly....and for now we wait....  Next Friday we "may" hear some news but we are told that it is likely at least a 3 week delay.  I am sorry for us, for the families that it is affecting and mostly for the children who now have to wait longer......

Please pray for the situation in Ukraine - that they will lift the quarantine as soon as possible.  Please pray for "V" and the other children who have to continue to wait.  Also pray for the health of the people in Ukraine. 

I know that God is bigger than H1N1 and that I can trust Him on our timing. 

Time for a Celebration! We got our appointment date!

Today we got the email from Ukraine with our State Department of Adoption appointment for Monday, November 9, 2009!  We will leave on Friday, November 6 for Ukraine!

As you can guess we are happy!  We want to surprise "V" and show up!  I can hardly wait to see his sweet face and to squeeze him so tight! 

It is so amazing that it has happened this quickly!  If you look at my timeline it is only 12 weeks from the time my husband said yes until we have our appointment!  So, it will be about 4 months from start to finish!  Quite an accomplishment for an international adoption!!!  Thank you God for your blessing!!!!  I will be posting some during our trip and will fill in even more after our trip!  Stay tuned for more to come....Please keep us, our family, "V" and the process in your prayers!

Little Ray of Sunshine on a Crazy Day!

Thursday was a crazy day!  Started off hearing that a family that is wanting to adopt a girl turning 16 had their dossier submitted but they wouldn't give them a travel date because the local USCIS had not sent the approval to the embassy.  So to start off the day I met them at the USCIS office and tried to find out what needed to happen - unfortunately they had no clue....so I made plans to wake up at 2am to call the embassy in Ukraine to find out what we needed to do.

Later that day, I got emails from Ukraine telling me that families dossiers had alot of mistakes by the Secretary of State's office....I love that Jenya said, "The Secretary of State must be tired because he is making alot of mistakes."  Had to make plans to get all the documents re-apostilled on Friday - fortunately I had the families do extra copies and was able to pull all but one document together.

But the little ray of sunshine in the day was receiving a letter from Ukraine from "V"!!!  Unfortunately it was in Ukrainian cursive - no way I could read it!  Luckily Val and Jenya came to my rescue and translated!!!  It warmed my heart to read what he had written:
Hello, this is the letter from V. I love you and DO wait you to come in November. I miss you so much. Thank you for your present. And thank you for everything. I love you all - whole family and really want to join you soon. As you said I prayed to come to you! I miss all family so much, and I miss Takers (Tucker) and Riley .

Kisses. See you soon!
V

Not much longer sweet boy and we will be there!!!!!!!!

The Waiting Game....and how much God cares!

I just had a friend text me and ask if there was any news on our adoption and I sent her a text saying, "Wait, wait, and wait some more..."  Literally within a minute of me sending it I got a new post on Facebook that said, "Caught up in the wait today?  We're praying for you.".  Amazing how God reaches out to us and shows us how much he cares - even on the little things!!! 

Here is the message from Show Hope that was linked to the Facebook post:

Faithfully, I Will Wait
Posted on October 13, 2009 by mckensey . http://ow.ly/ueC2


As I drove the back roads to work this morning I had the radio playing like usual. A song came on that I’ve heard quite a few times lately but today it stuck a different cord within me.

I’m waiting. I’m waiting on you Lord.
And I am hopeful. I’m waiting on your Lord
Though it is painful. But patiently I will wait.
Typically I sing along with an inward focus thinking about things in my life I’m waiting for. That special someone, for God to answer something I’ve been praying about…but today my heart went out to all the families that are waiting for their child to come home. I thought of the two hundred plus names that sit on my computer waiting for us to get notice that it’s time to travel so we can send them their grant award. With China and other countries slowing so dramatically over the past years, we hear story after story of families who have made the decision to adopt, started the process, are ready to make this happen but for now they are simply stuck waiting.

I will move ahead bold and confident.
Taking every step in obedience.
While I’m waiting. I will serve you.
While I’m waiting. I will worship.
While I’m waiting. I will not faint.
I’ll be running the race. Even while I wait.

I think for all of us it’s easy to get caught up in the wait. Wondering when it will happen, wondering why it’s taking so long. But the next line calls us to live while we’re waiting. Keep running, keep serving, keep on living and try not to focus on the wait. Easier said than done that’s for sure.

I’m waiting. I’m waiting on You, Lord.
And I am peaceful. I’m waiting on You, Lord.
Though it’s not easy. But faithfully, I will wait.
Yes, I will wait.

To all of you out there who are caught up in the waiting know that I’m praying for you today. As I’m paying the bills, running reports, responding to e-mails, and going about my daily routine, you are on my heart and mind!

Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD. Psalm 27:14
I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope. Psalm 130:5

The Power of One - Revealing God's heart and His glory!

Katie from the previous post with her 14 beautiful daughters!  Please read more about Katie at http://www.amazima.org/!  She is a true example of what one person can do if they trust God and are faithful to His call.  My prayer for Katie and her daughters are that God will bless them even greater in Heaven than they could ever imagine and that they would continue to be an inspiration to others.  She has accomplished so much at such a young age - I can't imagine what more she can do (I should say what God can do through her).  I know that someday Katie will hear God speak to her, "Well done good and faithful servant." 

Post that will make you question your life...by Katie

This past weekend I was at an adoption conference in Nashville and was informed about a beautiful 20yo girl that is living an amazing life for God in Uganda.  At 20yo she has moved to Uganda to be a teacher and care for orphans.  She has personally adopted 14 children (remember she is only 20!).  I hope you will take the time to read some of her posts.  She has made me question my committment to God and what I am doing with my life.  The link I have provided will take you to her blog. 

Let's just say that after reading some of her posts....I want to be Katie when I grow up.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007
http://kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com/search?updated-min=2007-01-01T00%3A00%3A00-08%3A00&updated-max=2008-01-01T00%3A00%3A00-08%3A00&max-results=30


it is pouring. it is freezing. the power has been off for days and the water lines are down. yet i stand in the middle of 25 children praising and thanking the Lord. our usual outside worship has been taken indoors due to the storm, so instead of praying together, the children are praying in their individual rooms. i am in the primary boys room which is home to our boys ages 6-10. i have never seen anyone so alive with love for their Maker. some stand with their hands in the air. others, like me, so overwhelmed with awe, have fallen to their knees on the cold, cement floor. the beautiful sound of 26 voices lifted in prayer drowns out the beating of the rain on the tin roof. God is so in this moment, i feel so full of His love, that my heart threatens to burst. this is not something i can explain to you. this is not something words can ever capture. this feeling is bigger. the splendor of God in this room takes my breath away. we all pray out loud and our voices mix into one, all different word, but the same message: thank you. THANK YOU.



at first glance, it would be easy to feel sorry for these little boys. their clothes are tattered, they sleep on old, dirty mattresses, they walk to school barefoot in the rain. they have no electricity, no running water, and it is raining so hard that the whole compound has become a muddy swamp. but you should not pity these children, in fact, you should envy them. i know i do. at six years old, these children know what it is to be filled with the Holy Spirit. these children know the Greatness, the Wonder of our God.



when was the last time you prayed out loud for 30 minutes? when was the last time you spent as little as half an hour listing to the Lord all the reasons that you love Him, thanked Him for all He has done for you, or even simply marveled at his awesome grace?



ive had people ask me why africa is so impoverished, even had people tell me that it is a cursed nation. africa is not impoverished. these children are not poor. we are. we put value in things. these children, having no things, put value in God. we put our trust in relationships, these children, having already seen relationships fail, put their trust in the Lord. this nation is blessed beyond any place, any people i have ever encountered. God has not forgotten these people, in fact, i believe He has loved them just a little bit extra.



i sit here freezing and wet in this pitch-black room as the rain beats on the roof, and God is so close i feel i can touch Him. my deepest prayer is that i could know that Lord as well as the first-grader next to me. all my senses are full of His greatness. Gods glory has fallen down into this place and is soaking us even deeper than the rain. i never ever want to be dry.

Our Last Document!

I received an email from our local USCIS officer today that my I171-H approval to adopt was put in the mail yesterday and I should receive it today!  That is the last document I need to complete my dossier - so it will be off in UPS tomorrow on it's way to Kyiv! 

Six weeks from start to finish (could have been 5 if USCIS hadn't stopped at "S" last week - I did it in 5 weeks in 2007)!!!  In two weeks our dossier will be submitted to the State Department of Adoptions in Kyiv and we will await our travel date!  We have asked if possible to have our appointment on October 26th or 27th - I figure it doesn't hurt to ask!  We could potentially be home for Thanksgiving!  

I am so thankful that it has been quicker this time - it is hard to wait when you feel that "your" child is far away and needs you!  I pray for all the children who wait and all the families waiting to go and get them!   I confess it is not something I do well...........

Here is a poem about waiting....

The Wait by Russell Kelfer

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate...
and the Master so gently said,"Wait."

"Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!"
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.

My future and all to which I relate
hangs in the balance and you tell me to Wait?"
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign.
Or even a 'no,' to which I'll resign.

You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply.

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
as my Master replied again, "Wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
and grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting...for what?"

He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine...
and He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.

I could give all you seek and pleased you would be.
You'd have what you want, but you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint.
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.

You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
you'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
when darkness and silence are all you can see.

You'd never experience the fullness of love
when the peace of My spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.

The glow of My comfort late into the night,
the faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.

You'd never know should your pain quickly flee,
what it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
but oh, the loss if I lost what I'm doing in you.

So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
that the greatest of gifts is to truly know me.
And though oft My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still "WAIT".

WOO HOO!!!! Fingerprint letter came today!

I am happy to report that the much awaited fingerprint letter came today!!!!  Doing the happy dance!!!  Now one last step in our dossier completion is our USCIS I171-H approval to adopt!  We are praying that it will be here no later than October 6 - which will give us a week to get it notarized, apostilled, mailed to Ukraine, translated, certified and submitted on October 14! 

Please keep us and the other waiting families in your prayers! We're all anxious to get our children home!

Tick...Tock...wait...wait...and wait some more!

I am happy and a little sad at the same time.  My friend Julie got her fingerprint letter today from USCIS - one step closer to getting to Ukraine!  I took my application and hers and dropped them off together but my letter didn't come.  I am hoping it is just slow mail and mine will be here tomorrow...praying it will be!  I also sent her dossier to Ukraine at the exact same time I sent mine and what happens??????  Mine gets to Ukraine a day later!  Our facilitator gets our dossiers registered to submit the same day and guess what?  Her appointment is October 13 and mine is October 14!  So it seems to be that I am destined to be a day later....which I am okay with as long as it is only a day or so! :)  Now we pray that our fingerprints are processed QUICKLY!!!!!  We need our approval to be in Ukraine no later than October 10th!  Please pray that USCIS will be timely!

Out of the mouths of babes - or Children say the darndest things!

Yesterday my girls were talking about being adopted and Payton said that she had 3 moms - a biological mother, a Godmother and a real mother. Melted my heart!!!!!!! The other girls chimed in that I was her adoptive mother and she replied to them,  "Mom isn't adopted." 

I told her that I liked being her real mom!!!!!

The Countdown!

Yesterday officially marked the 2nd week of my submission of USCIS - now I am awaiting the "offical" letter for fingerprints. Each day rushing out to check the mail anxiously hoping that the letter might be there! After fingerprints - then it will be the nervewracking countdown for the I171-H USCIS approval! THe last document needed for my dossier (paperwork).

I also got good news yesterday - my dossier will be submitted on October 14! And we can expect to travel 2-4 weeks after that - so we are on target for late October, early November. The news was received slightly deflated because I was also told that if I had my USCIS approval, my dossier could have been submitted today............kind of takes a bit of the joy out of it! But I am trying to trust God's timing - I know how my clients feel during the wait and even on the 3rd adoption, the wait isn't really any easier.

For me, once it was in my heart to adopt (knowing or not knowing the child) I have had the sense of urgency to get to "My" child. As a mother, when you know your child needs you, your first instinct is to get there immediately! That is how I feel - one day away from "my" child is one day too many! One more day of them feeling unloved, scared, lonely is one day too much! I would be on the next jet out of here if it were possible!

At least when you are expecting, you know where your child is, and the care they are receiving and that is a comfort. The wait can still be hard but in adoption, everything is seemingly out of your hands - your paperwork depends mostly on the efficiency of some government clerk to do their job in a timely manner, your employer to cooperate in getting a letter the way it needs to be done, your doctor to fill out a form as directed, the list goes on......then when your paperwork finally gets to Ukraine, you wait some more...

The end result is well worth the effort, the wait and the emotions. When you are home with your child and you can see their happiness, it is overwhelming. Just like when you may have glanced upon your newborn. Watching them at a school function and realizing that it may be the first time they had someone in the audience for them, celebrating their accomplishments, and seeing them blossom under your love and the security of a family is priceless.

So for now I wait....praying that some person at USCIS will do their job and send me my *(&^%#@$# approval so that I can go get my boy already! :)

What is in a name?

For those of you who know me personally - you may know that unintentionally I began a naming trend with my kids - one that has gotten away from me. I didn't set out to do but it has ended up that way. When I was 13, I picked out the names Logan and Jordan and fortunately my husband liked them and that is what we named our son and daughter.

When I was pregnant with my 3rd child, I sort of liked the idea of naming a daughter after my mother but wasn't sold on "Grace". I was watching a show called Models, Inc (a Melrose Place spinoff that tanked) and there was a leading female character named Grayson. I didn't like the meaning of the name or that it had the word Gray in it - so I changed the spelling to incorporate the name Grace (and the meaning - undeserved gift) with the word "Son" after Jesus - so her name means "An undeserved gift - which we received through the Son". Graceson the end result.

Then came Lauren, meaning "crowned" and I thought of how she was going to now have a new life and was victorious over the old and how they used to crown runners with the laurel wreath in the olympics. Paul refers to this in his writings in the Bible.

Okay - so many of you may wonder why we would change the name of our daughters from the names they were given and that are from their heritage. Some disagree with it - that it is taking away who they were and their heritage. When we were adopting Lauren, we were also a bit torn as to what to do, but when we met Lauren and saw she was only 5 months old and found out that she had not been named by her mother but given her mother's name we decided to give her a new name (we had chosen Lauren but had decided that we would give her Ukrainian name as her middle and call her what was best). While in Ukraine I met a missionary who had also adopted and I shared this indecision with her - she reminded me that whenever God did anything new in a person's life that he gave them a new name reflecting their new circumstances (ex. Abraham, Sarah, Jacob, Paul, Peter).

I thought that was a wonderful perspective to have! So, then not only did I have the trend of names ending in "N" I decided at that point that the names had to have great meaning.

Okay - now for Katelyn, her name came from my one of my favorite Bible verses "Pure and faultless religion is caring for orphans...James 1:27. Katelyn means "pure". Humorous side story is that when I first decided on the name Katelyn, I thought it meant "light" and I went on and on in my prayer journal about the symbolism of light in the Bible. Her Ukrainian name was Yelena, and when I looked up the meaning it meant "light".

I chose Payton because it has a couple of meanings - one is "village of the warrior" which where we live we are the Whiteland Warriors, and where she is from is where the Russian navy (warriors) is docked. Plus the Scottish version of her name means "royalty" or "of noble birth". Now she is God's family and is the daughter of a king!

At last, it is time to name our new son! It has been a family affair of throwing out names ending in "N" and then looking up the meaning! Jeff, my husband, has been a huge help in throwing out names such as "Lantern" which he told me meant bright light! LOL!!! He has also contributed "Cotton" and "Bison" - needless to say he doesn't get final say! The girls all seem to think they have the right to name him - of course they all 5 have different names they like! While I appreciate their opinion, I remind them it is the parents decision and they will have the opportunity to name their children!

Jeff and I seem to agree on one name - Griffan (yes spelled with an "a" instead of and "i" - which happened when we were naming Payton (first had Peyton and then Graceson pointed out all our kids have 2 syllable names, ending with "N" and all have a "a" in it - see what I mean on how it got away from us? :) I found that in Welsh that it means, "strong in faith". I also love the symbolism of what a griffin (gryphon) is.

SYMBOLISM OF GRIFFIN: In symbolism, the griffin combines the symbolic qualities of two solar creatures, the lion and the eagle. It is the king of birds and lord of the air united with the king of beasts and lord of the earth. Griffins are a symbol of the sun, wisdom, vengeance, strength, and salvation. The griffin's ability to soar like an eagle made him an emblem of poetic and spiritual inspiration.

The griffin's dual nature led it to be associated with Jesus Christ, God and man, king of heaven and earth. The eagle half of the griffin signified Christ's divinity and the lion half represented his humanity. During the Middle Ages, griffins were symbols of Christ's resurrection. The strength of the lion and the wisdom of the eagle combined in the griffin symbolized the strength and wisdom of God. "Griffins are protrayed with a lion's body, an eagle's head, long ears, and an eagle's claws, to indicate that one must combine intelligence and strength." Besides - what 11yo boy wouldn't think it is cool to have his name come from such a cool creature?

Funny thing is his name, Vadym is derived from Didymus which is also Thomas. Thomas means twin. When I was going to have Graceson, I prayed fervently for twins (boy and girl). In adoption lingo - whenever you adopt a child that is less than 9 months in age from one of your children it is called "ARTIFICIAL TWINNING". I never dreamed that God could answer that prayer 11 years later in this way! God does have a sense of humor!

So the long and short of this rambling post is that a family should do what THEY feel is best for them and the child. A couple adopting from infertility may have a name that has a significant meaning to them and should have the opportunity to use it - it isn't a right only give to people naming their biological children. In our family - Vadym would have stood out from Logan, Jordan, Graceson, Katelyn, Payton and Lauren. We want him to feel as much a part of our family as he can. Plus since God is giving him a new beginning - I want to celebrate that new beginning with a new name. It is a name that speaks to what we want for him and one that includes him in his brother and sisters. We are not trying to rob him of his heritage but to give him a sense of belonging. Each family will be different in what they decide - there is no right or wrong answer.

A Picture Speaks A Thousand Words

Do any of the children in this picture look like orphans? 4 out of 5 of them were (well technically one still is but prayerfully not for long!). I think this picture shows what love can do to change a child's life. When "V" was here, he said that being with us in America was like a dream he could have never imagined. You can see the happiness on his face! Look at all of them closely - which of them knows what it was like to beg for food? Which of them was diagnosed as "failure to thrive"? Which of them deserved what they got? Which of them was born in to a safe and loving environment? Which of them is not worth the effort it takes to adopt?

The sad truth is that there are thousands upon thousands of children just as beautiful (well almost :) speaking from a mother's heart), just as precious and just as deserving as these children to be loved, to have the security of a family and the opportunity to know God.

If only more Christians would step out of their comfort zone and really focus on TRUE RELIGION as defined by God, there would be more photos of FORMER orphans like this. Below is a song that I wrote (I am not a songwriter!) - please read the words and think about it. Is an orphanage good enough for your children? The Bible says to do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Is there any cost too high to save YOUR child? Too many times I talk to families that are considering adoption but choose not to because of the cost (not always financially - usually emotionally, or too much out of their comfort zone). Thankfully, Jesus didn't count the cost for us.....

LOVE DOESN'T COUNT THE COST by Lydia Tarr

Mommy, How much did I cost? (child's voice)

Verse:
There’s no price on the value of a life – I just knew
Price was not considered in deciding to love you.
When I saw your face, I didn’t stop to count the cost,
Nothing really mattered then, I knew my heart was lost.
Love doesn't count the cost.

Chorus:
No need to measure sacrifices made
The cost of love, the price I paid,
All I knew
Is when I met you,
love didn't count the cost.

Verse:
If you were to measure all the wealth upon this earth
None of it would equal a portion of your worth.
Too many children wait, so much stands in the way,
Precious lives lost, for no one wants to pay.
Love doesn't count the cost.

Chorus:
No need to measure sacrifices made
The cost of love, The price I paid,
all I knew
is when I met you
love doesn't count the cost.

BRIDGE
How do I value the the time it would take,
Or the sacrifices I would make?
Who said love doesn’t cost a thing?
The truth is… love doesn’t count the cost.

Verse:
When Jesus came to save, was it all about the price?
His blood was shed so we might live - total sacrifice.
What did he do when it was time to pay?
Did He let the cost get in His way?
He didn’t count the cost.

Chorus:
No need to measure sacrifices made
The cost of love, The price He paid,
all He knew
is when it came to you
love didn't count the cost.

Too many children waiting,
precious lives are lost,
is there no one willing?
Love should never count the cost.

3 GREAT BOOKS I WOULD ENCOURAGE YOU TO READ!

I the past few months I have come across 3 amazing books that I would highly encourage you to read! They will stir your heart to action and give you a bigger picture of what it really looks like to serve God.

First book I read was by Tom Davis, RED LETTERS, Living a faith that bleeds. It focused on the words that Jesus spoke in the new testament. Tom Davis uses personal stories to bring the need to life and encourage you to respond as Jesus would have.

The second book I read, I have mentioned on here before - CRAZY LOVE by Francis Chan. Hopefully many of you found the free download. It will make you take an inventory of your life as a Christian and encourage you to want to change from lukewarm safe christianity to someone who is on fire for God.

The last book I am still reading but it is equally as good - it will break your heart for those who are in need - THE HOLE IN OUR GOSPEL by Richard Stearns. In America today so many of us are blissfully unaware or passively ambivilent to the huge needs in the world outside of our own comfortable life. This book will challenge you to think globally about how much you are needed to minister to someone else's need.

I hope anyone who reads this will consider taking the time to change their perspective on life and pick up one or all of these books!!!!!

Another Great Post by Guest Blogger

Okay - I know it probably seems lately like I should name this blog - Heidi's blog but she has posted some really good messages that I really love. Her comittment to adoption and her passion sound as strong as my own! I too get the questions about what did adopting do to "My Kids"? I love her response! I feel the same - that it has so richly blessed our whole family. I hope if you are struggling with this question - the answers below will encourage you!

A Greater Capacity by Heidi Weimer
Every day I receive emails from potential adoptive parents and post-adoptive families asking for advice, support, feedback, direction, and information regarding adoption. It thrills us to be able to point people in the right direction, advise families in the process, and pray for those who are preparing to live out James 1:27. This is the ministry God has given to us, and we are stoked. Our vision is to serve as full-time adoption advocates, and we are making real steps in that direction. Soon we will be operating through our We Have Room web site, which will act as a resource for those stepping into the adoption world, those who are just getting their feet wet, and those who are swimming in the post-adoption sea, sometimes raging and sometimes of glee. We feel honored to be able to be used even in just a small way and to let others know, "Hey, we've been there."

One email that I receive a few times every week sounds a little something like this: "Heidi and Kirk, Your story has been very encouraging to us, as we also feel led to adopt older kids or a sibling group, but I am just very scared of what it might do to our family, how it will affect our current kids, and what kind of short- and long-term implications it might have. Can you tell me how your biological kids adjusted to being knocked out of their birth order? How did your oldest feel about no longer being the oldest? I'm afraid I'm going to be taking away from them something that is legitimately theirs and I'm scared of what that will do to their emotions/personality/self-worth/security/what-have-you. I'm afraid they will feel ripped off."

To each and every person reading this post who knows the concrete conviction of being called to care for the older orphans yet also bears the weight of the accompanying thoughts of fear, I want you to know this...Please hear me loud and clear, as we have now SIX times over displaced our "original" kids' birth order:

You are NOT taking anything AWAY from your birth children. Instead, what you are doing is imparting to them something eternal: You are expanding their capacity to love. Think about that for a minute before you read anything else. How do you plan to teach your child to love others unconditionally and in total compassion without giving them the opportunity to do so? I'm telling you now, You CAN'T.

My biological children have a greater capacity of love in their hearts than I could ever impart to them by just giving them a safe Christianity, by maintaining their status quo, by simply modeling "godliness" as parents (as if that's the end-all be-all for a Christian family). My kids...all of them...have lived out self-sacrifice and understand (because they live it!) that laying down one's life does not steal anything from us. That is the lie of the devil, who would have us believe that sacrifice is not worth it; that there is nothing for us in return; that God doesn't really mean what He says when He said to His followers that "anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. [Because] Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it" (Matthew 10:38-39).

Do you really believe that? That whoever LOSES his life for Jesus's sake, for Jesus the Orphan's sake, will actually FIND it? Ask yourself honestly. Because you might answer YES prematurely. I have no doubt that you might believe it for yourself, but do you really believe it for your children, too? That if they "lose" their "place" in the family that Jesus will instead impart to them LIFE? REAL life???

What is birth order anyway but just a sequence of how your child came to you? Let's not make an idol of that sequence. Because that's what it becomes...an IDOL. Something standing in the way of you taking up the Cross to follow Him, to BE JESUS in this world. Let's not place a value on birth order that God did not intend to be there.

Consider the older orphan. Consider the sibling groups. Consider the ones who are not often considered.

And whatever you do on your adoption journey, PLEASE I beg you, do NOT steal from your children the opportunity for their love capacity to be expanded. Do not deny them the true gift of learning early in life that "My life is not my own."

When your feisty and spunky 7-year-old biological daughter, who is now the middle child of 9 after being knocked down to #5 from #2, pleads "Please, Mommy, Please!!! I want another sister my age!!! Can we PLEASE adopt again?!!," your heart will beat out of your chest, not just because you can envision another child saved, but because you know that your daughter will NEVER EVER live a limited, safe Christianity. She won't even know what that means. In fact, she won't even have the capacity do so.

And all because you didn't limit her, either. You didn't limit God.

Give your children the gift of the greater capacity to love. Let it ripple out into the future. Let it change the world.

Did you hear the loud scream?

It was about 5:55pm today and it was a loud scream of joy! I got mine and Julie's dossier shipped off complete except for USCIS!

It was an all day chase to get homestudy and docs from our homestudy agency.

From there had to go to USCIS and got lost had to call Tom Uhrig (thanks Tom!) to get me there to drop off our I600-A.

Then on to State Police to pick up limited criminal history reports that I caught before they mailed them and then over to Secretary of State to get it all apostilled. Met some nice families adopting from Africa!

After that went to pick up Julie's marriage certs from Plainfield then home to seperate it and check it (glad I did as there were a couple of documents the Secretary of State had stuck together!) Prayed over it with my family and then to UPS - whew!!!!!

Tiring but it should be winging it to Ukraine by tonight!!!!!!!!!!!!!! There on Thursday - hopefully not stuck in customs!

Pray for safe travel and then for USCIS to quickly process our I600-A's!!!!!!! Now all I can do is wait - and pray! I am ready to bring our boy home!!!! And I know alot of other families anxious to bring home their children too! Tonight I pray for all the children who are waiting and all the families preparing to go!

How Can We Not? (adapted from a post by Heidi Weimer)

I am thrilled to announce that my husband and I have just begun the process to adopt the 11yo boy I wrote about earlier in my blog, "V". If things go as hoped, we hope to have him home by Christmas! It is amazing to think that we will have 5 children ages 8-11 and a grand total of 7 children!!! In light of this - we are sure to get the questions....

WHY? Why would we adopt one more child, considering we now have 6 children? Why would we do this? Haven't we done enough (considering we have adopted 3 already)? Why devote our lives to this "cause" (if you can truly even call it that).

Here's why:

Because we believe that this life is not our own.

Because we believe that in the end, it won't matter what career ladders we climbed or financial investments we made or what gadgets we could afford. It will matter that 4 children's lives were saved.

Because we have seen hopelessness firsthand in Ukraine and elsewhere, but believe in all hope that each child is a child of God.

Because we believe that the orphaned child is no less valuable to the Creator than the polished child in a suburban neighborhood here in America.

Because we see nothing more worthy of our focus, time, resources, and lives.

Because injustice is a wrong worth righting.

Because the orphaned child is still a child.

Because we know that, while adoption is not the solution in and of itself to the orphan crisis 143 million times over, we have seen with our own lives how it rescues the lives of those who can be adopted.

Because we believe that Jesus died for redemption, not just for eternity, but for our lives on this planet and we believe we can be vessels of that redemption for children's lives here.

Because we know that, if it were our own flesh and blood, we would want someone to love them and call them family, too.

Because we believe that adopting a child is the closest thing to resembling what God did for us by adopting us in to His family.

Because, really, these kids are no different from your own. Not at all.

Because it's just not okay with us to say no to a child who needs a home when we have one.

Because it's just not okay with us to say no to a child who needs a family when we have one.

Because it's just not okay with us to say no to a child who needs love to thrive when we have that love to give.

Because it's just not okay with us to do nothing.

Because it won't be okay with them if we do nothing.

Because it's just not going to be okay to do nothing.

"Rescue the perishing; don't hesitate to step in and help. If you say, "Hey, that's none of my business," [i.e. "that's not for me"] will that get you off the hook? Someone is watching you closely, you know— Someone not impressed with weak excuses." -Proverbs 24:12 (The Message)

"Once our eyes are opened we can't pretend we don't know what to do. God, who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls, knows that we know and holds us responsible to act." Proverbs 24:12

Quote on adopted children

"Many of our children come with “junk” that is
a byproduct of a past which can never fully be
known or understood . . . In the face of this it is
important to remember, and to remind our children
often, that there is a purpose for their lives, even as
we consistently offer them the love, grace, protection
and discipline they need to help them grow
and thrive."
by Michael Monroe
Michael and his wife Amy, lead Tapestry, the adoption and foster care ministry
at Irving Bible Church in Irving, TX.

Powerful Message by guest blogger Heidi Weimer

As I read the message below - it resonated deep within me. Heidi is speaking about the very foundation of which I have based my ministry on the past 8 years and why I work in the field that I do - ADOPTION. It is not to profit off of the needy but a driving passion that I was seemingly not able to accomplish in any other way but something so big in me that I could not rest or keep silent and what motivates me daily (also why I could talk about it endlessly and do! :) - I hope as you read this it will both convict you and encourage you. I pray that God speaks to your heart as you read this:

I wish I could tell you... by Heidi Weimer

I wish I could tell you that the sacrificial life of following after Jesus and being His actual hands and feet on this Planet Earth would bring rewards on this planet. But I can't. Because it probably won't.

I wish I could tell you that if you take in an orphan and love that child as your own flesh and blood, that you will be blessed in this life in more ways than just spiritual. But I can't. Because you might not be.

I wish I could tell you that it's easy to adopt. That it's effortless and glamorous and always beautiful. But I can't. Because it isn't.

I wish I could tell you that it's easy after you adopt. But I can't. Because it's tougher than tough some days.

I wish I could tell you that this life of sacrifice is painless and prosperous. But I can't. Because it's often painful and rarely prosperous in the earthly.

I wish I could tell you all of those warm and comforting platitudes, but I can't. Because they're not true.

What I CAN tell you, though, is that this life is not your own. So none of the above matter anyway.

When I stepped off of the cliff in full recognition of that reality, I have had no control over my life since. Yes, I have choices. I realize that I chose this road. I said yes to this calling. I agreed to take in 6 kids that I did not have to call my own. But once I said yes the first time, I could never say no after. Once I took Jesus seriously, Jesus took me seriously. I was wrecked for Him and for this life and could never tell Him no. Never again. If I say no to a child who needs me, I'm saying no to the Child Jesus. If I say no to an abandoned baby who needs me, I'm saying no to Baby Jesus. If I say no to a sibling group who needs a family, I'm saying no to Jesus and his brothers and sisters. Think I'm exaggerating?

Matthew 25:44-46 (The Message)
44"Then those 'goats' are going to say, 'Master, what are you talking about? When did we ever see you hungry or thirsty or homeless or shivering or sick or in prison and didn't help?'

45"He will answer them, 'I'm telling the solemn truth: Whenever you failed to do one of these things to someone who was being overlooked or ignored, that was me—you failed to do it to me.'

46"Then those 'goats' will be herded to their eternal doom, but the 'sheep' to their eternal reward."


I mean, it doesn't get more blatant than that. But alas there it is for us so-called Jesus followers.


And, here's a little warning: Once you utter that initial walking-off-the-cliff YES to Him, it doesn't get any easier. In fact, it gets more painful and far more difficult. Saying YES the first time was the easy part for us, even though that certainly was not easy. Because--the fact is--every single day I see the reality of my choice to say YES to Jesus in need. I see the white picket fences, the new cars, the private schools, the suburban "dream," the picture perfect families. I see that. I know what I'm saying no to. I am fully aware that I had a choice to embrace "that" life, but that I chose to embrace His instead.


It's often painful. Usually not easy. Typically lonely. Generally overwhelming. But I know that this life is not my own. The reward for me is most likely not on this planet. In fact, it most certainly isn't. Most probably I will never live in a fat house (by American standards) and drive a fancy car and have any spare cash to sit on. I realize that. I know that. And I also know that I could have sought those things for myself and could have had them. I absolutely know that that life is within my reach. Every time I encounter someone who has embraced fulfillment in the temporary, I am reminded like a big banner (or a slap in the face) that I chose this road instead. And every time I am reminded, I hear God asking me (practically audibly sometimes), "So, you still want to follow the narrow road?" [YES, Lord. Here am I. Send me.]


Loving the fatherless. Loving the abandoned. Loving the seemingly hopeless. The narrow road requires sacrifice.The narrow road. It's lonely. It's long. It's difficult. It's full of suffering and struggle and sacrifice. But isn't that what following our Jesus is all about? If you're following a Jesus that doesn't demand sacrifice of all earthly endeavors, than I don't know what Jesus you're following. Didn't Jesus, after all, sacrifice all earthly endeavors for us? What did He sacrifice so that He could love YOU? How much more, then, should we sacrifice in order to love Him? And if loving HIM means loving the unlovely and the unloved, then what does it mean if we live in comfort while the unloved go on unloved? While the orphaned stay orphaned? While the street kids still roam the streets?


I don't know how we can really claim to love Jesus if we don't love Jesus the Street Child. If we don't love Jesus the Orphan. Jesus the Prostitute. Jesus the Abandoned.

But what does it mean to LOVE Jesus the Orphan? What does it mean to love Jesus the Abandoned? It means that you do for Jesus the Orphan what you would want done to your own child.


Matthew 7:12 (New International Version)
12So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.

In a world that seems so complicated and chaotic, it really is as simple as that. It's what led me to see my own children in the faces of Ethiopia's orphans in the first place. It's what led me to say yes to children who simply needed a family. Who needed me. Who needed someone to see Jesus the Orphan in them.

Matthew 16:23-25 (The Message)
23But Jesus didn't swerve. "Peter, get out of my way. Satan, get lost. You have no idea how God works."

24-26Then Jesus went to work on his disciples. "Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You're not in the driver's seat; I am. Don't run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I'll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What kind of deal is it to get everything you want but lose yourself? What could you ever trade your soul for?


Matthew 16:23-25 (New International Version)

23Jesus turned and said to Peter, "Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men."

24Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. 25For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it.

Where is your cross? What is your suffering? Go seek out Jesus the Orphan. You'll find your cross and suffering there. And there you will finally find Jesus. The One you did not see before and the One you did not know to love.


And then and only then, Great Will Be Your Reward. I can't count on much, but I can count on that.

Luke 6:34-36 (New International Version)
34And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' lend to 'sinners,' expecting to be repaid in full. 35But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons and daughters of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 36Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

Luke 6:34-36 (The Message)
31-34"Here is a simple rule of thumb for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you; then grab the initiative and do it for them! If you only love the lovable, do you expect a pat on the back? Run-of-the-mill sinners do that. If you only help those who help you, do you expect a medal? Garden-variety sinners do that. If you only give for what you hope to get out of it, do you think that's charity? The stingiest of pawnbrokers does that.

35-36"I tell you, love your enemies. Help and give without expecting a return. You'll never—I promise—regret it. Live out this God-created identity the way our Father lives toward us, generously and graciously, even when we're at our worst. Our Father is kind; you be kind.

I know my family is not the so-called American Dream. I know that having 9 kids is certainly not the goal for most sane and ordinary people. I know that having a multi-racial family can really mar some people's plans for a supposedly picture-perfect family. But so what? This life is not your own. Don't live a lie believing that it is. Whose plans are those, anyway, for the picture-perfect home? the picture-perfect family? the American dream? I don't remember Jesus standing on the mountainside preaching in favor of any of those, so whatever you do, make sure your plans aren't just that...YOUR plans.

My life is not my own. And if you claim to follow Jesus, your life is not yours, either.

Galatians 2:20 (New International Version)
20I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

Go. Leave behind the life you planned. SEEK OUT the orphan. Don't ask God one more time if He wants you to adopt. Because...HE'S been asking YOU, who WILL?



1 John 3:17 (The Message)
16-17This is how we've come to understand and experience love: Christ sacrificed his life for us. This is why we ought to live sacrificially for our fellow believers, and not just be out for ourselves. If you see some brother or sister in need and have the means to do something about it but turn a cold shoulder and do nothing, what happens to God's love? It disappears. And you made it disappear.